I don’t think many will understand the reason for this post…. this is not meant in the way you might think of it.

It was 2012
I am driving drown the highway behind the ambulance. Lights are filling the night sky red and blue. Tears are filling up my eyes, I am scared. I prayed the whole drive. The blood was everywhere I watched as it drop by drop hit the floor. My hands are red, the seat next to me is blood stained. I watched them panic, the fear in their eyes. Questions are asked, none can I remember.This plays…..

They take you away……… I never saw you again.

Strange how memories stay with a person. I have always been blessed with a great memory so I have been told. Though think of it this way. The above memory it lodged in my mind forever. What you have not understood by what I wrote is the crazy issue is that I don’t do blood at all. It is as the time I am driving I am more worried about the person in the ambulance and I am in a mode that happens to many people know about. It is automatic responses to certain issues. Then when the danger is over your natural reactions take place, for me I normally pass out.
My memory is good enough to remember the smell of the blood as well. I remember everything about that night and if I am not careful I relive the memories emotions and all.

I have always found it insulting when the ex-to-be says “you never loved me” I went thought hell for her and would do everything all over again if I had to go back in time. Cause right now I am so very happy with my life right now. It is very sad how it ended but for years I saw this coming. You can only put another person through hell for so long before they just plainly walk out.

Now to explain what I meant by “I never saw you again” the ex-to-be and I lost a child that night….See you though it was about her. You were wrong, it was about the child we never got to know and I still to this day feel a sense of complete loss for.